Domestic Violence Poem by Sue Ellson
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“Let me take a small step to get the help I need. It must be out there. Let me plant the first seed ”
Sue Ellson is an Australian writer and advocate whose poetry gives voice to survival, courage and renewal. Her words have travelled the world from support groups to classrooms - helping others find language for their pain and strength. Her poem A Domestic Violence Poem has become a global touchstone for those reclaiming their power.
In relationship I thought
I would find true love
After all it had such
A wonderful start
I connected deeply
In heart and mind
Their touch, their word
Was all I wanted to find
Then one day
A trigger occurred
The hurt began
My soul was stirred
But what is love
If it has conditions
Surely it was a mistake
And they had their reasons
The comments, the moods
The challenges, the torments
They started increasing
Cascading intolerance
By now I was bent
Quite out of shape
Doubting myself
But longing for escape
Who would believe me
How would I survive
Trapped like a prisoner
And locked inside
A mind that couldn’t function
A house not a home
Fearful each moment
Nowhere to roam
My dreams vanished
Survival was all I knew
From this breath to the next
Was all that I could do
I would catch glimpses
Of what life could be like
But it wouldn’t take long
For me to be back in strife
Wrong, wrong
It was always my fault
Wrong, wrong
My heart locked in a vault
Tears, fears
Darkness and terror
Must I remain
In this horror forever
How can I protect
Myself and my loved ones
When I can hardly breathe
Have no resources or funds
Desperate and dismayed
I see no way out
I’ve tried before
But I’m back on this couch
Mixed emotions plague my day
Freedom excites but fear makes me stay
Glimmers of joy light my mind
Maybe it could work this final time
Let me take a small step
To get the help I need
It must be out there
Let me plant the first seed
Let me listen and learn
And find a way forward
I may not have to leave
But I need to move onward
Yes I need help
And my partner does too
It may not be easy
But I’ll see what I can do
Some people won’t understand
And that’s okay
I will explain later
On a brighter day
To rescue and repair
My broken reality
It could take years
To return to normality
But on this journey
Of life and living
With help and support
One day I’ll be thriving
I’ll learn to receive
Kindness and care
I’ll understand my worth
And set boundaries fair
I know there is love
In so many forms
Beyond touch and presence
Its power transforms
In kindness I’ll reflect
On what I’ve survived
I’ll dive within
And cherish my prize
Wisdom and insight
Will give me strength
For now I know
I can go any length